When fighting or selling, you always have an opponent/customer you meet in person. In sales especially, many times people say that one has two ears and one mouth, thus one needs to listen to more than talk. On the other hand, in many martial arts styles, the emphasis is on attacking techniques. Many times this is due to the fact that you train alone or with train a set pattern of techniques, which make the learning and repetition easy. But in which case should you play with your strengths and in which case should you capitalize on your opponent’s weaknesses?

In the year 2000, I was fighting in an open martial arts' tournament, where my opponent was a very strong in kicking and much taller than me. He had won a bronze medal in Tae Kwon Do European championships, thus excellent in keeping a distance and applying counter strikes, especially with kicks. I had previously that year, won a gold medal in world championships, but in under 58kgs class. Whereas, we were fighting that time in under 65kgs class. So I knew, when going to my training camp, that I couldn’t be using my normal strengths of keeping the distance and using my longer limbs to win the fight.

My coach and I knew, that I had to apply a different tactic to beat this guy, than what we normally used. Also, at the same time, we needed to prepare for the whole tournament and to win the other opponents as well. We decided to train 80% as we normally do and emphasis about 20% of the training time on training how to block and catch a kick. This would help me to take the game to a situation where strong kickers would be uncomfortable. And this would give me a chance to score points by taking the opponent to the ground.

I managed to win all the other fights, but against this guy, I lost on points. I did manage to catch his leg after a kick many times, but I wasn’t able to capitalize these situations, since most of my training efforts had been on catching the leg, not on what to do afterwards. Of course, one needs to catch the kick first and if that doesn’t work, then there is no chance to continue to a takedown either. But I didn’t win with just catching the leg. Our strategy was correct in trying to win the fight with his weaknesses, but fell short in not being able to train it to be my one of my strengths. We learned our lesson and next year, one of my teammates won a fights against him, by being able to continue with takedowns after catching the kick. We learned that to capitalize on opponent’s weakness is not sufficient by just recognizing it and having a plan towards it, but you need to build a strength to win the fight.

In sales the weakness is customer's need

With this perspective, you will look at your sales situation with different mindset as with what you would if you were trying to look for the weaknesses of your customer. Surely, you can spot weaknesses from your customer, but there is no point in "attacking" them, unless they are considered as needs by your customer. You have your benefits ready and see a spot where they would help the customer, but I would hold off, until you are sure that what you are about to introduce is really something that the customer needs. Sometimes, you need to build a new way to solve the customer's need, in order to win the deal. Prepare yourself as you would for a martial arts' fight. Build your strengths to match your opponent's weaknesses.

How to build strengths in sales

A lot of emphasis on sales training is spent on different sales techniques and how to ask questions. While as product training is often done, when a new feature or a new products are introduced. After that, it is up to the salesperson to get the needed information and update the knowledge. Customers are a good source for information and understanding how products helps them in practice. Customers are the ones, who in reality have benefited from using your solutions, thus know the best, about the advantages and benefits your company provides. They have chosen your company over your competitors and with some specific reasons in mind. The better you understand why your customers have bought from you and why they are happy with the purchasing decision, the better you will understand what are your strengths. While you talk with your customers and why they are happy to be your customer, you actually strengthen your relationships at the same time. It will be harder for your competitor to try to pitch in the next time.

How to open up weaknesses in a conversation

Apart from needs being weaknesses, there are also many sales tactics you can apply to your individual customer as a person. I briefly introduced SPIN-selling techniques in my previous post 'The way of perfection - is all about mistakes'. With SPIN-selling, you have a ready-made script for you conversation and you will get information which matters does your customer consider to be the most crucial parts to be fixed in her business. You will work with problems and see which of the current problems are actually troubling her and how she values the possible solution to fix these.

You might also want to read 'how to win a fight when your opponent is much better than you (part 2)', where I was writing about how to concentrate on your strengths and focus on being an expert, not only a salesperson who is trying to argue against a competitor.

Above mentioned strategies are both very effective and useful in a sales situation, but when it comes to getting to talk about customers weaknesses on a personal level, I consider more psychological aspect to be the most effective. I am not talking about how to lure your customer to trust you, but how to build trust in a way, where you will get the needed insights from your customer, in order to be able to provide valuable content to the conversation.

One of the best and most usable method is NLP. There you will try to find clues, on how to communicate to that person by using words and sentences, which the person reflects the best. Some people visualize the outcome. There you might say: "can you see what I mean". You can spot a person who likes to visualize things by seeing her looking up, when thinking of an answer for a deeper question. They might look outside of the window and their glance when thinking might be somewhat distant.

Some others are better in listening, thus their audible representational system is stronger. There you might say something like: "how does this sound for you". The third representational system is kinesthetic or simply put - touch oriented.

You adapt to your conversation partner and use words that are familiar to their approach. This helps you to build trust and your words to sink in better. I have noticed that people change their representational system from time to time. Sometimes, I like to look out of the window and think during a conversation. Some other time, I hold a pen in my hand and touch it. So, it is important to pay attention to the current situation at hand and adapt the words and sentences accordingly.

Tips for fighters about NLP

Check how your opponent is preparing himself for the fight. Does he need physical contact to feel his power just before the fight. Or is he concentrating on his own eyes closed. Is music and especially lyrics important for him. If he is a kinesthetic person, you might want to start with a rush in the beginning. Try to make him feel weaker than you. If he is a visual person, then you start with a smile and look like you believe in yourself and look like a winner. With an auditory person, you can say out loud to yourself a few words, which state that you are prepared and nobody can beat you.

If this tactic works well and you get into his mind, he will start feeling insecure and likely will reveal his tactics with strengths and weaknesses. From there it is up to you to take advantage of the situation.